


Surely weather-proofing should be the priority?

by carmellax



Category: Skulduggery Pleasant - Derek Landy
Genre: Canon Universe, F/M, Fluff, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-24
Updated: 2013-06-24
Packaged: 2017-12-16 02:20:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 573
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/856648
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/carmellax/pseuds/carmellax
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Billy-Ray,” she says accusingly, “don’t tell me that you’ve never seen Harry Potter.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	Surely weather-proofing should be the priority?

**Author's Note:**

> well this can mainly be blamed on "You liked Harry Potter", because it has since become a very definite headcanon that Tanith introduced it to Sanguine, and that the pair of them are total dorks about it behind closed doors

If there is one thing he hates more than hiding out in shitty B&Bs, Sanguine decides, it’s hiding out in shitty B&Bs that _leak_. You’d think that – if you were setting up a B &B in Limerick, where the mean annual rainfall is 977 millimetres – you might prioritise waterproofing. Sanguine shouldn’t even _know_ the mean annual rainfall in Limerick, but he is actually that bored right now, and the B &B has Wi-Fi. It has Wi-Fi, but no damn weather-proofing.

He points this out to Tanith.

“Really, Billy-Ray, you sound like a stuck record,” she says. “It’s giving me a head-ache.”

Sanguine mutters an apology, looking up to where she’s propped against the headboard. She looks exquisite – but then, doesn’t she always? He wonders how he ended up with a girl like her – someone with all the beauty of a glamour model, and all the brutality of a psychopathic killer. Oh yeah: she got possessed by a remnant. Funny how these things can slip your mind. Right now, her blonde hair is tousled, forming a deceptively angelic haze around her head, and her eyelids hover lethargically at half-mast, lashes casting shadow over the rings beneath her eyes.

Okay, perhaps she looks less like a glamour model and more like the poster-child for vitamin C supplements, at this moment, but she definitely pulls off the exhausted-and-ill look far better than anyone else. He doesn’t think he’ll ever get tired of just watching her: of taking in the way her lips part minutely as she breathes out; the gentle curve of her cupid’s bow; the faint crinkles where her eyebrows converge; the twitch beneath her left eye as she frowns.

“Will you stop staring at me?” she snaps.

“I ain’t staring,” he objects. “You need eyes to stare.”

Tanith fixes him with a look that could probably kill a puppy. If Tanith were given to killing puppies. Sanguine is pretty sure that even she isn’t _that_ heartless.

“Sorry,” he mutters. “I’m just bored.”

His girlfriend sighs loudly. “You’re a big boy now; you should be able to entertain yourself.”

Nevertheless, she grabs the TV remote from the bedside table, and calls the screen into life. It’s one of those old TVs that are deeper than they are wide, with a thin metal aerial looping from the back, and bursts of colourful static tempering the images it displays. Sanguine’s surprised it actually works.

“There must be something on,” she says, flipping between the four channels to which they have access. “Here you go – it looks like the first Harry Potter’s about to start.”

Sanguine grunts. “Ain’t that a kiddies’ film?”

Tanith peers at him, an odd expression settling over her features. “Billy-Ray,” she says accusingly, “don’t tell me that you’ve never seen Harry Potter.”

He shrugs. “I’ve got better things to do than watching films about magicians with silly names. Like, fighting magicians with silly names.  In the real world.”

“Billy-Ray Sanguine you are going to sit down on this bed right now and you will watch this film, and you will _like_ it.”

Sanguine isn’t enough of a fool to argue with that tone, so he scrambles up from where he’s been sitting against the ineffective radiator, and joins Tanith on the bed. There is no way in hell that he’s going to enjoy this.

159 minutes later, Sanguine is taking a sorting hat quiz on Facebook, and really hoping he gets Gryffindor.


End file.
